i have created an online journal.
it is called death metal poetry journal.
anyone and everyone is encouraged to send poems for it to rdowney15@gmail.com.
submission guidelines are on the site.
they are not very serious.
that is all.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Friday, May 11, 2007
why i have this sinking feeling that one day i will end up marrying someone who knows how to speak elvish
this is a conversation that happened in real life while i was working one day at ben & jerry's.
customer/stranger: You look like a little elf. You probably get that a lot don't you?
me: Ummm. Not really. Aren't elves already little?
customer/stranger: Yeah, but no, like one of the elves in Lord of the Rings, but not as tall.
me: Oh. Ummm. It's probably my left ear. It's kind of pointy.
customer/stranger: That was a compliment by the way.
me: Oh. Thanks.
customer/stranger: Could I get a scoop of cookie dough in a cup please?
me: Sure.
i just paid $88 in unpaid parking tickets. i am going to write an epic poetic narrative about paying $88 in unpaid parking tickets in between ruminations on the impact of Arthurian romance in contemporary society. i will get Anne Carson, Dr. Phil, and R.L. Stine to write blurbs for it.
customer/stranger: You look like a little elf. You probably get that a lot don't you?
me: Ummm. Not really. Aren't elves already little?
customer/stranger: Yeah, but no, like one of the elves in Lord of the Rings, but not as tall.
me: Oh. Ummm. It's probably my left ear. It's kind of pointy.
customer/stranger: That was a compliment by the way.
me: Oh. Thanks.
customer/stranger: Could I get a scoop of cookie dough in a cup please?
me: Sure.
i just paid $88 in unpaid parking tickets. i am going to write an epic poetic narrative about paying $88 in unpaid parking tickets in between ruminations on the impact of Arthurian romance in contemporary society. i will get Anne Carson, Dr. Phil, and R.L. Stine to write blurbs for it.
Tuesday, May 8, 2007
"This is a poem about Steven Seagal's new energy drink"
When I don't wake up before 9:00 a.m. my cat hates me.
He throws his body against my door with great force and screams for hours.
I want to go let him in but it is too cold.
I am a selfish human and my bed is collapsed in the middle so I can't move.
Sparksy understands this but Steven Seagal is angry.
He is raising his eyebrows with a menacing facial expression.
I am shaking from the cold but I pretend it is from fear and I look at his angry face.
I am aware that if I don't let Sparksy in Steven Seagal is going to break down my door
And then he will put it back on its hinges and break it again with more force than before.
I have seen him break numerous doors on made-for-t.v. movies.
My life is a made-for-t.v. movie.
My cat will eventually give up and I will go back to sleep.
And he will go back to sleep.
And Steven Seagal will remain ever-vigilante.
He throws his body against my door with great force and screams for hours.
I want to go let him in but it is too cold.
I am a selfish human and my bed is collapsed in the middle so I can't move.
Sparksy understands this but Steven Seagal is angry.
He is raising his eyebrows with a menacing facial expression.
I am shaking from the cold but I pretend it is from fear and I look at his angry face.
I am aware that if I don't let Sparksy in Steven Seagal is going to break down my door
And then he will put it back on its hinges and break it again with more force than before.
I have seen him break numerous doors on made-for-t.v. movies.
My life is a made-for-t.v. movie.
My cat will eventually give up and I will go back to sleep.
And he will go back to sleep.
And Steven Seagal will remain ever-vigilante.
Saturday, May 5, 2007
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)